Getting the BOOT!!

It was a beautiful afternoon in the summer of 2009 in the Belgian capital of Brussels.  My friend Eve Provencher, who was studying International Human Rights at the University of Glascow, decided after a long procrastination, to finally come visit me in Belgium.

I was giving Eve the full tour of Brussels, from my recollections of exploring the city in-depth a year earlier with my buddy Donny Reddekop.  I took her to the L’Archdua, where we could grab a delicious Orval beer with a cigar.  I also showed her this church with a urinal attached to the side. 

This urinal is extremely smelly, but allowed me to reminisce about the time when Donny and I, in a panic to find a bathroom, were forced to use this accommodation.  On the plus side, it costs nothing.  I think it is the only church in the world that allows one to pee on the side of it, which is advertised as such in the tourist map.

Then there is the amazingly impressive Manneke Pis, which is hyped to tourists, but to be honest, when finally arriving to Manneke, it is literally just a fountain of a little boy peeing, a very small fountain.  In fact one could almost walk right by it, if it wasn’t for the large group of Asian tourists all lining up to get their photo with this world famous fountain (note sarcasm).

We travelled through the Grote Markt, passed through some large impressive parks, and looked in some tourist stores and beer stores a like.  Then we finally hit the main tourist street, never remember the name, but it has tons of restaurants with hosts that will quickly grab you and pull you into their establishment for a bite to eat.

Most prices on this very crowded small street are relatively the same, with a similar quick menu, pretty much a get in, eat and get out scenario, but it is fairly cheap.  In that case, we finally settled on a three course meal, a piece of meat with fries, champagne and a little desert.

Then the same host who steered us into their restaurant, immediately rushed our payment and scooted us out, so as to clear room for other tourists that are to lazy to look for a decent Belgian restaurant (wink wink).

However, jokes on this individual because this was all part of my master plan, because in and around the corner, tucked completely in the back of a small street, is the real gem of Brussels.  Forget the Atrium, Manneke Pis, Mini-Europe and the Grote Markt, this place is Delirium Café.

This was the final destination of our tour of Brussels, which I had been waiting for the entire day.  Delirium Café, appropriately named after the famous beer Delirium Tremens, represented by a large pink elephant, carries over 2,600 beers in a telephone book sized menu.

This is where sampling beers really begins.  This bar has over 400 Belgian beers and the rest are beers from around the world, although a Molson Canadian is priced at 10 Euros (I know WTF), but in a drunken lack of judgement a year ago, my supposed best buddy Donny watched as I willingly bought a Molson Canadian for 10 Euros, for shame, I know, I have repented.

Aside from that one blunder, the Delirium Café has represented my personal notion of heaven.  The atmosphere at Delirium Café is always loud and surrounded by beer loving locals and tourists alike.  The crowded atmosphere creates a good vibe with like minded people excited about sampling as many beers as possible till they realize “Oh man, I am quite buzzed”.

At this time, my buddy Nizer informed me he was coming to join us in Brussels and that he would be right there.  This was perfect timing because as I blinked and rubbed my eyes to make sure if what I was seeing was true, there it was, with the light gleaming off it’s perfect shape, saying “You have been waiting for me, No?”.

I turned to Eve, “Oh man do you see that boot, chamazing”.

Eve was not as intrigued, but I did not expect her too be, that is why when Nizer arrived, I turned my excitement in his direction and stated in a calm voice “Dude, a boot”.

Immediately both of us ran to the bar, like children to a candy shop and ordered a couple one litre boots of Campus Gold beer, 6.6%.

Eventually, we were also able to coax Eve into a boot as well, so we all held our boots high and clanked the glass.  Nizer of course drank at his normal pace, which was pretty fast, after all he was Beer Emperor of his fraternity in University, which is a badge he wears proudly I might add.  I on the other hand keeping a steady pace would patiently wait for Nizer to look away, so I could take a long winded swig of my boot, trying sneakily to finish before he did.

It never worked, just when I would be close, Nizer would sneak a peak from his peripherals and take a very inhuman gulp, finishing the rest of his beer and giving a smirk, to say “Nice try Pogo”. 

Needless to say at one point or another all three of us encountered the bubble.  Yes, the infamous bubble that was explained on BEERFEST (the movie).  The bubble is a pocket of air that sits in the heel of the boot and when it builds up it explodes the beer straight into the drinkers face.

The secret here is to turn the boot counter clockwise; this was also taught by “Fink” on BEERFEST.  We all took turns practicing the art of the turn, but as first timers, no dice, we all had some nice splash back and spillage.  Eventually, we figured the key was to turn the boot quickly as the bubble exploded. 

Enjoying our final gulps, I grabbed the one litre boot glasses and returned them to the bar and to my amazement; another even more phenomenal site appeared before my eyes.

It was a 2 LITRE BOOT, oh my goodness, the real deal, as I ran enthusiastically to tell Nizer, we both agreed that the 2 Litre boot would be a whole other trip to Brussels.  In that case…………………………….Stay Tuned, this story gets better………………..

TO BE CONTINUED…………………………